As we get ready to officially usher in our long national nightmare we must prepare to have others' religious beliefs thrust upon us. The separation of church and state clause has become inconvenient for the party that claims to so revere the Constitution. Our Vice President-elect, Mike Pence ("And I also believe that someday scientists will come to see that only the theory of intelligent design provides even a remotely rational explanation for the known universe.”) and the nominee for Secretary of Education, Betsy DeVos ("There are not enough philanthropic dollars in America to fund what is currently the need in education…[versus] what is currently being spent every year on education in this country…Our desire is to confront the culture in ways that will continue to advance God's Kingdom.") appear ready to advance their religious agendas. I guess that is the difference between religious freedom (I can impose my beliefs on you) and freedom of religion as defined in the First Amendment of the Constitution (Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion...
Are you as suspicious as I of someone who constantly reminds you what a Christian they are? Shouldn't we know them by their actions? To quote the late George Carlin, “Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes.”
If you're an irreverent heathen like me, here is a primer on embracing beliefs: “Suppose neutral angels were able to talk, Yahweh and Lucifer – God and Satan, to use their popular titles – into settling out of court. What would be the terms of the compromise? Specifically, how would they divide the assets of their early kingdom.
Would God be satisfied with the loaves and fishes and itty-bitty thimbles of Communion wine, while Satan was to have the red-eye gravy, eighteen-ounce New York Steaks, and buckets of chilled champagne? Would God really accept twice-a-month lovemaking for procreative purposes and give Satan the all night, no-holds-barred, nasty “can’t-get-enough-of-you” hot-as-hell-fucks?
If you're an irreverent heathen like me, here is a primer on embracing beliefs: “Suppose neutral angels were able to talk, Yahweh and Lucifer – God and Satan, to use their popular titles – into settling out of court. What would be the terms of the compromise? Specifically, how would they divide the assets of their early kingdom.
Would God be satisfied with the loaves and fishes and itty-bitty thimbles of Communion wine, while Satan was to have the red-eye gravy, eighteen-ounce New York Steaks, and buckets of chilled champagne? Would God really accept twice-a-month lovemaking for procreative purposes and give Satan the all night, no-holds-barred, nasty “can’t-get-enough-of-you” hot-as-hell-fucks?
Think about it. Would Satan get New Orleans, Bangkok, and the French Riviera and God get Salt Lake City? Satan get ice hockey, God get horseshoes? God get bingo, Satan get stud poker? Satan get LSD; God, Prozac? God get Neil Simon; Satan Oscar Wilde?”
- Tom Robbins
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